I once loved Korean dramas, actually I initially hated them, screeching female voices made my ears bleed (you did this Boys Over Flowers!), and then they grew on me. I came to love them so much so that my Asian drama capacity was overloaded with only K-dramas with no room for what used to be a Japanese drama obsession. Tonight I was in the mood for some romance, over the top comedy and tears. SO MUCH TEARS. Well that mood quickly came and went as I sat watching some recent dramas. Its not like anything changed with them. Nothing ever changes. Clichés remain, leads are as good looking as ever, drama ensues, love triangles, blah blah…you get the point. The kissing has improved though – less dead pouting stiff fish and more lip action. 
Anyhoooow, dramas now frustrate me. They used to be a real pleasure to watch but now its tiresome and boring. The ironic thing is that the dramas I’m currently watching would have been something I loved a few months back. If its one thing I hate are love triangles (a sign that Kdramas aren’t for me, these things are present in ALL). It sucks even more when I love the second male lead more than main a.k.a Second Lead Syndrome. S.L.S doesn’t occur often with me but its annoying to see the nice guy (second lead) always be put in the friend zone and the spoilt, annoying, jerk end up with the girl because he suddenly had a change of heart. Oh joy! -__-
Honestly its this one drama that seems interesting but because it follows this cliché, I am unmotivated to keep watching. Shinning Inheritance had the same thing but I really liked Lee Seung Ki, he’s so freakin’ adorable. x) But that was a while ago and even then I felt sympathy for the second lead.
It sucks even more when I love the second lead, he’s seems so sweet, even if a bit odd and the main lead is an asshole with no redeeming qualities. The girl is obviously going to choose the jerk and I like her so WHHYYYYYY?!! Hmm I seemed to have lost my logic somewhere, just because I like the female lead is not enough reason to actually question her taste in men. But I’ll still do it. I’m not naming the drama because I’m prematurely judging it here, I’m only on episode 4. ^^;;
Maybe the male lead will redeem himself in the future episodes, I hope he does because I’ll be so pissed after I finish this series and dramas are my feel good entertainment dammit! The sad thing is not only do I have Second Lead Syndrome but I love the supporting male character the most. He’s so fucking cute and sweet. Damn lead, why you got to be a rich, spoilt, asshole?! Ah well its the change I’ll be rooting for.
I should never blog at 2:30 in the morning, my lacking writing skills have seemed to slip even further down an abyss of no return. DRAMAS HAVE TAUGHT ME TO BE SO MELODRAMATIC. *TEARS*
My friend has an interest in a guy (her co-worker) who seems to be her ideal but she is resigning tomorrow and refuses to ask for his number. Her excuse is that she has never talked to him before and it would be weird if she randomly asked him. I didn’t get the big deal, if he said no, it wouldn’t really matter because she’ll never see him again. And if he said yes, then great. But she absolutely refused and we debated for a while over this situation. Honestly, I don’t care about the guy but I have a problem with my friend caring so much over what people think of her and her fear of following through with her actions to get what she wants. She said that the next time she meets her type of guy, she’ll ask for his number.
Its always a ‘next’ time isn’t it? Its bullshit. She claims that she isn’t ready and next time she would be which seems senseless to me. The current situation is the perfect practice run of taking a risk because regardless of how it turns out, she’ll never face him again. And doing nothing doesn’t exactly prepare her for the ‘next’ time. I talked big in our debate and it made me think of what I would do in that situation. I don’t like talking to people, I’m very quiet and it is difficult to put yourself out there so I get where she is coming from.
I don’t want the guy I’m interested in to think negatively of me. What if he thinks I’m desperate? What if he tells his friends and they say shit about me? That would make my life more difficult. My thoughts became even more dramatic and for a moment I almost accepted that it was okay to not take a chance. Fear was getting the best of me. As time passed my thoughts changed to a more positive tune. My own friends taught me that before words even leave your mouth, they’ll already be saying shit. You don’t have to do or say anything but people will still say crap about you. If the guy I liked says shit about me then he’s not worth it and opinions aren’t permanent. He could change his opinion about me later on.
Rejection, embarrassment, and people bitching about me all pale in comparison to the definite death that awaits me. Most likely, however crappy I am feeling due to the things listed above, its not something that will scar me for the rest of my life. It might be something I will grow and learn from. Taking risks in life is the only way you can truly live. People will laugh, they’ll say bad things, bring you down, you’ll probably cry and get frustrated but in between all those fucked up emotions there exist the good things too. We always tend to focus on the negative rather than the positive and its our attitudes that changes our perspective. In most cases waiting is simply an excuse. For me, putting off something makes me think of it less until it doesn’t seem important any more. So many people end up in unhappy, unhealthy relationships and dead end jobs because they’re in waiting or too afraid.
The debate between my friend and I made me think of how I need to be more conscious about my actions and that I need to push myself more. If I follow my own advice she might see more credibility to it. This applies to anything we want in life, this blog merely stemmed from a conversation about a guy. You just need to go after your metaphorical guy. I’m going to attempt to overcome my social anxiety and I know its going to be difficult but CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
